Live The Right Way - Be a NON Complainer

Whiners, thumbsuckers, complainers and blame specialists, all have one thing in common...

THEIR OWN PROFESSIONALISM...

... in the special art of... PRACTICED MISERY.

The fact is, we ALL may have been influenced by our own madness at some time or another. We may still be at the mercy of it to a certain degree.

But c'mon... there's got to be a sell-by-date on all that foolishness... right?

Continually whinging, whining, blaming and complaining about... our health, our job, our business, the state of the economy, our own economy, rogue politicians, the crummy weather, relationships, confidence levels, life prospects, age, time...

... complaining about any of that DOESN'T help. Doesn't move us forward. Doesn't help us fix what needs to be fixed.

Have you heard of Randy Pausch?

A much loved Professor at Carnegie Mellon University.

He's NOT a complainer.

Even when diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. (terminal)

He chose to live life... to the fullest... with fun, excitement and adventure.

And he chose to live that way, well before being diagnosed.

But now, knowing what he now knew, his life, took on a whole new meaning.

Here's a ten minute or so video.

Watch it.

We ALL need to learn a number of lessons... in how to live well. We need teachers to teach and inspire. You'll find Dr Randy Pausch hard to beat as a life educator, inspirer and a really good human being.



If you know someone who continually complains about a part of their life, and does nothing about it, stick this video in front of their eyes.

If YOU have been complaining and whining about something you've wanted, but is not happening... or... something unwanted has happened that has you locked into a being a blithering blamer, see this video and note the effect it has on you.

And if it doesn't have an effect on you... check your pulse to see if you're still living!

How about making this a 2010 commitment (or even, a life commitment) - to crush blaming, whining, thumbsucking and complaining in all its forms, and instead... DO SOMETHING TO FIX WHAT NEEDS TO BE FIXED!

It's an interesting choice - whining and complaining or fixing things and moving on.

And the rewards of both?

Well, it's either... happiness or misery.

And we can choose the kind of day-to-day experience we want.

Raja Hireker

P.S. Here's the video made AFTER Dr Randy Pausch's death.

Hanging Ourselves With Our Own Noose!

There's an unfair place, where the judge, the jurors, everyone - has got it in for us.

But you know, in this Kangaroo Court, EVERYTHING is fair and just.

Huh?

Here's something simple, though what I think, powerful at the same time.

We need nothing OUTSIDE of us to commit ourselves to a life we hate! One of misery. One of continual blame and apathy.

Quite honestly, we pretty much sentence ourselves to the life we have based on nothing more than the thoughts we feed ourselves.

And often, no... ALWAYS!... it's 100% to do with the make-believe stories we create and feed ourselves.

And what happens when you feed something, continually? That's right - it GROWS and EXPANDS... and, depending on the thought, it turns into something ghastly and horrible.

So, what happens when you catch yourself saying (and it's only ALWAYS the thought that creates all of it)...

... "how do I get past the fear, how do I get the courage, how do I get the desire, I'm uncomfortable about this, how do I get passed that, I'm overwhelmed with things, how can I manage things, I've got so many things going on that I don't know what to focus on, I have faith and hope that things will get better but it doesn't seem to be working..."

So of course, there's NOTHING going on here apart from the sweet stories we stick to for dear life! And we've continually - just like a guest we've grown fond of and accustomed to - feed the story until it becomes a rampant, self obsessed, personal philosophy.

I'm scared - A STORY we've made up.

I need more courage - a STORY that says I've no courage.

I need to be more willing - a STORY that says I won't do anything until I become more willing, first.

I need to get past the fear - a MAKE-BELIEVE story we hold onto to get us OUT of action.

Make-believe thoughts - they'll cripple us -- if we let them.

Ask a kid if they'd like to go out to and play in the snow and they'll leap up and let out a yell that you wouldn't believe. Ask the kid if they want to go out and play in the snow wearing shorts and a t-shirt, they'll look at you and think you're Santa who has just made their biggest wish, come true!

You'll notice that there's no story there that kids cling to. There's no fear.

There's no need to feel courageous or muster up the willingness to do it - they DO IT, without any kind of silly, made up, story.

There's nothing getting in the way of what they want - there's just super excitement and a life of adventure.

Can we live like that as adults?

Sure. All we need do is practice a story that fuels and feeds us in a way that supports what we want.

No stupid foolish story needed - especially the ones we hang ourselves with... those stories we cling that act like our own noose - where we become the judge and jury in a Kangaroo Court... created out of our own madness.

Simply pure excited adventure and energy. And that comes by deliberately choosing what we want and how we want to live. Why not script and create another story for you - one that'll have you falling in love with YOU and what you want?

It's About Love, Not Time...

There's a HUGE myth running in and out of our brains and it goes something like this...

"I'd love to do that but I just don't have the time."

Now not only is this a common line for most... it's a BIG FAT LIE.

And the reason that it's a big whopper is because if we really loved something, really loved something... we'd MAKE the time to DO IT... wouldn't we?

I mean, it just makes plain simple sense.

And that's where most of us go wrong - thinking that simple, isn't something valuable enough so we go look for the complex and it's no wonder because check out the huge chaos in our brains!

So, say I want to play the piano and I want to be good at it but oh look, there's no time in the day for it so looks like I'll have to put that on the shelf of my life and carry on with the normal and the mundane and the boring stuff of my everyday life and... oh my gosh, let me check the calendar... GASP.... I've only a few more years left before checkout time!!

Can you see the diabolical chaos going on in our heads because we believe the pathetic lie that there's not enough time so I'm going to scrap something that I say is really important to me in my life... can you see the chaos going on here?

And so when we get to the bottom of it all, the thing all along was that... I really DIDN'T WANT to play the piano because if I did, if I really loved and wanted to play it and it was something that I thought about and I listened to the music I wanted to play and I could imagine myself playing the piano and I go and find out about piano classes and I look to see about purchasing maybe a used piano...

Well, then there's evidence that I'm really into this and I'm really loving this and this is what I want to get really good at and whatever time I've got in the day or the week, then I'll go at it with all I've got because I really want this. And if I REALLY want it more than I believe, I'll be up early and I'll be DOING IT.

So you see, it's NEVER a matter of not having enough time. It's always a matter of Do I Love it Enough TO MAKE THE TIME and get really good at what I want to do.

And that's pretty much it.

Of course, there's all the inner flapping of the head and mind we get into when there's a reason to defend and justify things and all that but none of that matters because all the conversation stops when we're DOING what we say we want.

And the conversational flapping stops because we're really doing it because we love it.

I'd love to make this more difficult and more complex and more deeper but you know, life's not meant to be wasted.

Raja Hireker
www.CoachingByWriting.com